October 13, 2021 • 29 mins
Join The Estefans for a special conversation with one of the most powerful Latinas in the country, Justice Sonia Sotomayor. From the projects to earning her seat on the highest court in the land, Justice Sotomayor’s incredible life story defies all odds. Now she's bringing her invaluable wisdom and priceless life lessons to the Red Table.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Bien Benito's Gloria Stefan. Here you are listening to Red
Table Talk via Stephens Podcast, all your favorite episodes from
our Facebook watch show in audio. When I think of women,
I admire this fierce, fearless trailblazer is high on my list.
One hundred and fifteen justices have served on the Supreme Court,
(00:24):
only five of them have been women. Justice Sonia Sotomayor
was chosen by President Obama and made history as the
first Hispanic person to be appointed to the Supreme Court
after two hundred and twenty years. At that moment, my
heart started to thump. Born in the South Bronx, she
(00:45):
was raised in a housing project not far from Yankee Stadium.
Now she is one of nine justices who decide where
the law stands on the biggest issues of our time.
The Supreme Court is in the news more than ever,
but we don't often hear from the justices themselves. They
rarely grant interviews. The greatest secret to the success of
my life is asking for help. This is a special
(01:09):
Red Table Talk event. I've had the honor of getting
to know her over the years, and I'm so excited
to bring her brilliance to the table. She is filled
with priceless wisdom and life lessons you won't want to miss. Justice.
(01:30):
Welcome to the Red Table. So happy, it is so wonderful,
if only to see you, virtually suggested weren't were you
when you get the nomination? How did you find out?
I didn't actually believe that President Obama was going to
pick me. Everyone else that was on his short list
(01:51):
had been interviewed and I wasn't being interviewed. I thought, gee,
maybe I'm just there for show. And all of a sudden,
my cell phone rings and I pick it up, and
the woman on the other side says, this is the
White House switchboard, Please hold for the President. At that moment,
(02:13):
my heart started to thump, and within seconds, the President
of the United States gits on and says, I have
decided that I would like you to be my nominee
to the United States Supreme Court. I did something I
hardly have ever do. I'm a tough PRONX kid. I
(02:36):
don't cry. And I said to him, Mr President, I'm crying,
and he said, Judge, you don't have to cry. I'm
putting together the best team to get you through this
confirmation process. Those confirmation hearings have got to be pretty rough.
I imagine they are horrible, Gloria. During the process, there
(02:58):
were critics of my soul election, people who were saying
that I wasn't smart enough, that I would never make
meaningful contributions to the Court. And those criticism stung. They
hurt deeply, and at one point I actually thought of
pulling out and writing a note to the President and
(03:21):
saying I don't want any more of this. And the
one person I confided in said to me, Sonia, get
over yourself. This is not about you. This is about
my daughter. She needs to see a Latina as a
Supreme Court justice. You can't give up. And that kind
(03:42):
of shook me. It made me realize that, yes, it
wasn't about me. We talked about talk and being a
powerful woman. Have you ever been insecure? How do you
deal with that? I don't know that you can come
from any challenge back rout, have any hardship in your
(04:03):
life without feeling insecurity, because hardship does teach you that
there are so many variables in life that are outside
your control. The greatest obstacle to success is fear. Yes,
when you are afraid and don't do things. That is
(04:26):
what can hold you back. If you don't try, you'll
never know. If you try and succeed, you have the
great opportunity to enjoy something. Absolutely, when I read your book,
By the Way, you could have been a novelist. Yes,
I was crying. I'm a better judge. I think in
(04:48):
the second chapter of your book, I broke down crying
because I was telling Lily and Emily that you and
I kind of share that same time period in the
United States growing up coming from his fanic households. But
you went through particular challenges, and you know, a lot
of people don't know that the Supreme Court is a
(05:08):
branch of government. They don't know who's on the Supreme Court.
Sometimes is it about justice or is it about the law?
I think that there is a common misperception most people
think about the law as justice and the two words
in I think most people's minds are combined. But the
(05:30):
law is not picking sides and not choosing who to
help or not help. That misperception is what makes so
many people suspicious about the law and suspicious about its value,
because I think most people think of justice as fairness.
But we don't play Solomon. We don't divide babies. We
(05:53):
decide issues according to what the law is. And that's
a very different process. It must be hard for you.
The hardest part of my job, you know, when I
have to say something that's contrary to what my feelings
are and what I think might be just under that
fairness standard. That's the toughest, toughest thing. So how do
(06:16):
I live with it? I live with it because I
have an abiding faith in the system. I believe in
our system of government, in our system of law, and
I believe that each of us plays a role in that.
And so it's that fundamental belief in the system that
(06:36):
lets me continue in it. Do you hang out with
the other justices? We see more of each other than
I've ever seen of any other judge. Friends, when you're
on the Supreme Court, you do everything together. There's one
rule of our lunch. We don't talk business. It's all
about each other and our families. What exciting vacations somebody had,
(07:01):
or what interesting person they met. We don't talk politics.
They don't want to get into fights. We are friendly
with each other despite their ideological differences. The nine Justices
have always been a close knit group when their longtime
friend and colleague, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, lost her battle with cancer.
They were devastated. Ginsburg was the second woman ever appointed
(07:25):
to the Supreme Court, where she served for twenty seven years.
Justice so Do Mayote remembers her friend as an American hero.
She spent her life fighting for the equality of all people,
and she was a path breaking champion of women's rights.
She served our court and country with consummate dedication, tirelessness,
(07:46):
and passion for justice. She has left a legacy few
could rival. I will miss Ruth greatly. She often said
that leading a meaningful life means living for one's family
and one's community, not for self. You had a lot
of challenges. You grew up in a tough neighborhood in
the Bronx. How was your relationship with your parents when
(08:09):
you were young. My dad was an alcoholic, and so
my memories of my dad are not all good ones.
There are some very good ones that I treasure, like
going to a grocery store and shopping for food, because
it was the one really positive memory I had of
(08:30):
my father. That was the one time in a week
where I saw my father without him having been drunk. Essentially,
what did you learn and what can we tell this
generation to be careful with When alcohol becomes a necessity,
when it is more important then the relationship you're in
(08:55):
or the people that you're with, then you are losing
your life. You're letting it drain away. I know my
father loved me. I know my father adored my brother,
and I know the love story that my mother and
father had when they met. And that love story got
destroyed as my father's drinking went out of control and
(09:20):
the alcohol was stronger than his love for us. And
once that is destroyed, you've left your life behind and
you will stop having a life that's worth much justice,
so does father died of a heart attack when she
was just nine years old, leaving his wife to raise
(09:41):
her two children as a single mom. She raised not
only a justice, that also a doctor, and you guys,
came from nothing. Absolutely. My mom is my life heroine.
Everything in life I've learned from her. I've learned to
love from her. She taught me the importance of education.
(10:04):
My brother and I she had so much more hardship
than I did, and yet she not only raised us,
but she herself. When she was in her early fifties,
went back to college and got her nursing degree. It's
hard to have that kind of example, and my brother
and I not appreciate the importance of education. And I
(10:27):
know that early on you were a stickler about doing
well in school, and you realized that you had some
limitations because of where you grew up and because of
the fact that you grew up in a Hispanic household,
where we know how that is, we we speak Spanglish.
My first four years in grammar school, I was at
(10:51):
best an average student, and that was because I learned
Spanish before I learned English at home. I was delayed
and only on understanding what teachers were teaching me. One
of the first things I did, I went to the
smartest girl in the class, Donna Ronnella. She's still a friend,
by the way. And I went up to Donna and
(11:11):
I said, you get good grades, how do you study?
Donna explained it to me, and after that I began
working at the lessons she gave me, and I became
a good student. So I think the greatest secret to
the success of my life isn't I being ashamed of
asking for help. And it's my hope that if anyone
(11:33):
is listening to me today that they understand how important
a characteristic that is to not only not be ashamed
of asking for help, but also to do it. I
know as a little girl justice he had a devastating illness.
(11:53):
What was that like? Yes, I'm a Type one juvenile
diabetic and I have been since I was seven years old.
That diagnosis was a very difficult one. It was not
an easy condition to live with. The treatments were rudimentary.
The needles were the glass needles with the metal points,
(12:16):
and what would happen is after many uses, the needle
would start wearing down and blunting. My father gave me
the shot the first day, and he was so nervous
his arm was shaking. The next morning, my mother was
home and she gave me the needle. I felt like
she just reared back and bullet my arm with the needle,
(12:41):
and that hurt. So the next morning, I'm in the
kitchen and I'm listening to them fight about who's going
to give me the needle. So I pulled a chair
to the stove because I had a heat the metal
needle and sterilize it. And Bommy sees what I'm doing
and she comes over her, and she says, what are
you doing? And I said, I'm gonna do this myself.
(13:04):
That's an example right there, at seven years old of Sony.
From the beginning, you were strong willed, you knew what
you wanted and that you had a very clear purpose.
Were you ashamed of it at all? Did you hide
it from anybody? Emily the shame. I hid my disease
(13:25):
into my thirties, and my openness developed after a party
that I hosted in my home. I had a sugar low.
I'm in a room full of my closest and dearest friends,
and not one of them knew that something was wrong.
Someone came over with a piece of the cake that
was being served, and I just opened my hand and
(13:48):
grabbed the cake and stuffed it into my mouth. And
at that point she knew something was wrong because that's
not the kind of thing that I would do, and
she stopped and she at, Sonya, what's going on. I've
then realized after the party that all of these people
who knew me and loved me and who I know,
(14:10):
if something had happened to me at that moment and
they had not taken care of me, that they would
have been devastated, and it was that moment that made
me realize that I had to be more open about
my condition, that I had to talk to the people
I loved about it absolutely and had to talk openly
about it, because hiding things doesn't help anyone. When did
(14:32):
you first start thinking about what you wanted to do?
What was in your mind when you were thinking about
your future? Obviously, I grew up in a housing project
in the Bronx, and there were no lawyers or judges
that I knew of in my neighborhood. And you can't
really dream to be something unless you know that something exists.
(14:54):
The real source of information about your possibilities is your education.
You can learn how to dream big. And your mother,
like mine, felt it was so important that you went
to a wonderful parochial school right with the nuns correct correct,
like you, I was on scholarship, and like you, my
(15:14):
grandmother was my hero, her grandmother was her hero, and
her grandmother was her hero. I feel that that's one
of the most wonderful things that Hispanic families have to
offer our kids, because our extended family is crucial in
the upbringing of our kids, and they have so much
(15:38):
wisdom and so much to offer. Grandmothers know a part
of you that others just don't see or understand. She
was such an influential part of my life. She was
our refuge in times of trouble with our parents, saw
both our strengths and our weaknesses. And you're right about
(15:59):
the theino extended families is such a critical part of
giving us a sense of belonging, of giving us a
sense of joy about life. Absolutely, And you got into
an Ivy League school, Justice, How did you do it?
How did you get into an Ivy League school. It
wasn't till my senior year of high school that a
(16:20):
very very dear friend of mine called me up. And
I still remember this conversation. Sonya, you have to apply
to the Ivy League schools. And I said, Ken, what
are those schools? And he listed a number of them.
And my next question was, well, I can't afford it.
You'll get a scholarship. Your family is poor enough, Sonia,
(16:42):
just apply And I said to him, but why should
I bother? And his answer was they're the best schools
in the country, Sonja. They will change your life. You
must try. I didn't know enough back then to have
anybody read my personal essay. I did the best that
I could. I'm grateful to this day that I got in.
(17:03):
What advice do you have maybe for somebody who is
desperately trying, you know, maybe to get into an ivy
league or something like that, and they just don't get
it the first time or for the second time. There
are reasons why one may be rejected from one place
but accepted in another. You can't focus on the no.
You have to focus on the yes. Gloria, you often
(17:25):
speak about Amilia being NonStop. I know both he and
you have that spirit in you. I'm happy you mentioned
Amilia because him and I are a team, and we've
been our own cheerleaders, and there's nothing that spurs us
on more than someone telling us no. That is the
(17:46):
most motivational word in emilias and my vocabulary, when somebody
says no, you're too American for that, and you're too
Latin for the Americans. You'll never cross over, You'll never
do this. You can't compete on a worldwide market, but
we have We have each other. You know what it
surprised me about Soto Mayori is every time I buy
(18:10):
her any of my release in my book and everything.
She's been there for me. Imagine having the you know,
Supreme Court, first Latin, a woman in the world, and
she comes and you know, support me. You do something
to prove that you can be incredible, succesful, and you
still can be simple and honest. And that's what I
love about her. Women are that matter? Man. I still
(18:31):
believe that. I know that you had a partner, your husband,
for seven years, and I know that you've been together
all through high school. What did you learn from that relationship?
From your marriage? You know, not every marriage succeeds, mind didn't,
(18:52):
but it was an incredibly important part of my life.
And we got married right after we finished college. Um
as to be expected in a Latina culture. I was
already an old lady. Gloria. Yes, we know, but I
appreciated from him understanding how the support of one another
(19:13):
is so critical in everyone's life. But perhaps I should
tell you a lesson that I learned from our breakup.
What I found out was that the people who have
got me through we're my girlfriends. Yes, we talked about
that all the time, and they rallied around me to
be the listening piece for the insecurities that I had
(19:36):
for the moments in which I felt alone, And I
think that many people should understand that both moments are
precious and important, those of being with someone and those
of being alone as well. It must be daunting, though Justice,
for someone to date you like because first year you're
(19:58):
a judge. It's been the rare person who has asked
me recently they would be afraid of you. Although I
must say, Gloria, I've had some fans right to me,
some gentlemen with more age than mine, right to me
and propose marriage. They're brave. I'm sure that you'll receive
(20:21):
some of those as well. Did you answer the letters? Oh?
I answer every letter I received. Okay, So what did
you answer? You think I wanted to I didn't say.
I said how thrilled and touched I was, but that
the business of my life was such that actually meeting
them was going to be very difficult. Well, ourur t
(20:42):
T community was so excited to hear that you were
gonna sit on the table, and they send us questions.
So this one is from Zoe. Let's see what she's
got tasked night. Question for Justice that they are is
what was your first day like to be answer. Oh,
my first day on the Supreme Court, I go to
(21:02):
my office and sitting in my office is a legal icon,
a justice by the name of Sandra Day O'Connor, and
she was sitting there waiting for me, and I was
so taken aback. That's such an important lady. She was
the first female justice on the Supreme Court in one
(21:28):
and she was alone on the court until Ruth Bader
Ginsburg came to the court in the ninet nineties. The
next visitor was John Paul Stevens, who at the time
was eighty eight and a half years old, and he
too was an icon of a justice. It was just
such a tremendous feeling to be welcomed by two of
(21:49):
the longest serving justices on the Court. I remember coming
out with my colleagues to sit at the bench and
I got chills down my back. Well, we're all living
vicariously through you. Absolutely, you are so sweet. We have
one more question. I want to know. Do you have
(22:10):
to dress up under your ropes? I guess you don't
have to do anything you don't want to when it
comes to what you wear when you have a rob on.
But the reality is that when you work on a
court like the Supreme Court, you do dress up. It's
been the most extraordinary adventure to be a justice of
(22:32):
the United States Supreme Court. Been tough on so many
different levels. How do you remain optimistic? Every time I
look sad at myself, I look around and see how
much I've been able to notice about positive things that
I've been able to see and notice about others. All
(22:55):
of us, in one way or another, have had to
come to terms with ourselves, and so I stay positive
always by trying to look at the positive. Well, what's
your advice for for the younger generations to help contribute
to this system and understand it more emily? You have
(23:16):
no choice. Your vision won't happen simply because you desire it.
Your vision only happens with hard work and commitment to
doing the right thing. I speak to kids all the time,
and I tell them that the most important role in
their life is being not a citizen with a capital C,
(23:40):
a citizen of a country, but being a citizen with
a small c a citizen of your community. That's the
most important role you can play in life. Just as
you've given us so much wisdom, So I want to
thank you I know that your words are going to
be incredibly important for everyone that is watching there today. Absolutely,
(24:03):
I hope that everybody knows Gloria. They know your talent
and Emilio's. But Emily, you are awesome. You play well.
I heard you play through the song that you created
for me. It wasn't to perform for you in any way,
and it was really just truly inspired by you and
(24:26):
who you are and what you do for me. And
I wrote it with the intention to do that to
somebody else. Emily, you touch my heart. She's never performed
in publicly, but she's wanted to debut the song in
your honor today and she's going, I'm oh, I'm so
touched them. Thank you. Every time I play it for
(24:49):
my mother, she cries, news is herb Still no one
(25:10):
knows what a real hero does. Stop looking all the
signals advertised, tilt eyes a little lower, justice, breathe when
she is going real changes made it dirt not sky.
(25:36):
Time to listen. We've been me s in that face.
He is a word can bear kill the sky? Her
last name doesn't change all the progress that she claimed
(25:56):
her country. This is what a in the macous like.
And she remains only brave. She is everything. Your daughter
should be everything your daughter could be, waiting on this
(26:30):
world to change, turning your brain to real, arrange flowers,
turn in the progress every day. Luckily, for girls like me,
we've had some proof to be a pillow for the
(26:51):
progress that we seek. Time to listen, Weber say that
this is what in Marickim looks like. Her last name
(27:14):
doesn't change all the progress that she claims a country.
This is what in American looks like. She means only bread.
She is everything your daughter should be. This is what
(27:38):
in Amaka looks like. Her last name doesn't change all
the progress that she claims the country is wor in
Americum looks like she remains only bread. She's everything you
(28:09):
do to d She's everything, and Tala should be everything
your daughter could be. Thanks for listening. To join the
(28:38):
Red Table Talk family and become a part of the conversation,
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(28:58):
Radio app, Apple Pod podcasts, or wherever you listen to
your favorite shows.
Bien Benito's Gloria Stefan. Here you are listening to Red
Table Talk via Stephens Podcast, all your favorite episodes from
our Facebook watch show in audio. When I think of women,
I admire this fierce, fearless trailblazer is high on my list.
One hundred and fifteen justices have served on the Supreme Court,
(00:24):
only five of them have been women. Justice Sonia Sotomayor
was chosen by President Obama and made history as the
first Hispanic person to be appointed to the Supreme Court
after two hundred and twenty years. At that moment, my
heart started to thump. Born in the South Bronx, she
(00:45):
was raised in a housing project not far from Yankee Stadium.
Now she is one of nine justices who decide where
the law stands on the biggest issues of our time.
The Supreme Court is in the news more than ever,
but we don't often hear from the justices themselves. They
rarely grant interviews. The greatest secret to the success of
my life is asking for help. This is a special
(01:09):
Red Table Talk event. I've had the honor of getting
to know her over the years, and I'm so excited
to bring her brilliance to the table. She is filled
with priceless wisdom and life lessons you won't want to miss. Justice.
(01:30):
Welcome to the Red Table. So happy, it is so wonderful,
if only to see you, virtually suggested weren't were you
when you get the nomination? How did you find out?
I didn't actually believe that President Obama was going to
pick me. Everyone else that was on his short list
(01:51):
had been interviewed and I wasn't being interviewed. I thought, gee,
maybe I'm just there for show. And all of a sudden,
my cell phone rings and I pick it up, and
the woman on the other side says, this is the
White House switchboard, Please hold for the President. At that moment,
(02:13):
my heart started to thump, and within seconds, the President
of the United States gits on and says, I have
decided that I would like you to be my nominee
to the United States Supreme Court. I did something I
hardly have ever do. I'm a tough PRONX kid. I
(02:36):
don't cry. And I said to him, Mr President, I'm crying,
and he said, Judge, you don't have to cry. I'm
putting together the best team to get you through this
confirmation process. Those confirmation hearings have got to be pretty rough.
I imagine they are horrible, Gloria. During the process, there
(02:58):
were critics of my soul election, people who were saying
that I wasn't smart enough, that I would never make
meaningful contributions to the Court. And those criticism stung. They
hurt deeply, and at one point I actually thought of
pulling out and writing a note to the President and
(03:21):
saying I don't want any more of this. And the
one person I confided in said to me, Sonia, get
over yourself. This is not about you. This is about
my daughter. She needs to see a Latina as a
Supreme Court justice. You can't give up. And that kind
(03:42):
of shook me. It made me realize that, yes, it
wasn't about me. We talked about talk and being a
powerful woman. Have you ever been insecure? How do you
deal with that? I don't know that you can come
from any challenge back rout, have any hardship in your
(04:03):
life without feeling insecurity, because hardship does teach you that
there are so many variables in life that are outside
your control. The greatest obstacle to success is fear. Yes,
when you are afraid and don't do things. That is
(04:26):
what can hold you back. If you don't try, you'll
never know. If you try and succeed, you have the
great opportunity to enjoy something. Absolutely, when I read your book,
By the Way, you could have been a novelist. Yes,
I was crying. I'm a better judge. I think in
(04:48):
the second chapter of your book, I broke down crying
because I was telling Lily and Emily that you and
I kind of share that same time period in the
United States growing up coming from his fanic households. But
you went through particular challenges, and you know, a lot
of people don't know that the Supreme Court is a
(05:08):
branch of government. They don't know who's on the Supreme Court.
Sometimes is it about justice or is it about the law?
I think that there is a common misperception most people
think about the law as justice and the two words
in I think most people's minds are combined. But the
(05:30):
law is not picking sides and not choosing who to
help or not help. That misperception is what makes so
many people suspicious about the law and suspicious about its value,
because I think most people think of justice as fairness.
But we don't play Solomon. We don't divide babies. We
(05:53):
decide issues according to what the law is. And that's
a very different process. It must be hard for you.
The hardest part of my job, you know, when I
have to say something that's contrary to what my feelings
are and what I think might be just under that
fairness standard. That's the toughest, toughest thing. So how do
(06:16):
I live with it? I live with it because I
have an abiding faith in the system. I believe in
our system of government, in our system of law, and
I believe that each of us plays a role in that.
And so it's that fundamental belief in the system that
(06:36):
lets me continue in it. Do you hang out with
the other justices? We see more of each other than
I've ever seen of any other judge. Friends, when you're
on the Supreme Court, you do everything together. There's one
rule of our lunch. We don't talk business. It's all
about each other and our families. What exciting vacations somebody had,
(07:01):
or what interesting person they met. We don't talk politics.
They don't want to get into fights. We are friendly
with each other despite their ideological differences. The nine Justices
have always been a close knit group when their longtime
friend and colleague, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, lost her battle with cancer.
They were devastated. Ginsburg was the second woman ever appointed
(07:25):
to the Supreme Court, where she served for twenty seven years.
Justice so Do Mayote remembers her friend as an American hero.
She spent her life fighting for the equality of all people,
and she was a path breaking champion of women's rights.
She served our court and country with consummate dedication, tirelessness,
(07:46):
and passion for justice. She has left a legacy few
could rival. I will miss Ruth greatly. She often said
that leading a meaningful life means living for one's family
and one's community, not for self. You had a lot
of challenges. You grew up in a tough neighborhood in
the Bronx. How was your relationship with your parents when
(08:09):
you were young. My dad was an alcoholic, and so
my memories of my dad are not all good ones.
There are some very good ones that I treasure, like
going to a grocery store and shopping for food, because
it was the one really positive memory I had of
(08:30):
my father. That was the one time in a week
where I saw my father without him having been drunk. Essentially,
what did you learn and what can we tell this
generation to be careful with When alcohol becomes a necessity,
when it is more important then the relationship you're in
(08:55):
or the people that you're with, then you are losing
your life. You're letting it drain away. I know my
father loved me. I know my father adored my brother,
and I know the love story that my mother and
father had when they met. And that love story got
destroyed as my father's drinking went out of control and
(09:20):
the alcohol was stronger than his love for us. And
once that is destroyed, you've left your life behind and
you will stop having a life that's worth much justice,
so does father died of a heart attack when she
was just nine years old, leaving his wife to raise
(09:41):
her two children as a single mom. She raised not
only a justice, that also a doctor, and you guys,
came from nothing. Absolutely. My mom is my life heroine.
Everything in life I've learned from her. I've learned to
love from her. She taught me the importance of education.
(10:04):
My brother and I she had so much more hardship
than I did, and yet she not only raised us,
but she herself. When she was in her early fifties,
went back to college and got her nursing degree. It's
hard to have that kind of example, and my brother
and I not appreciate the importance of education. And I
(10:27):
know that early on you were a stickler about doing
well in school, and you realized that you had some
limitations because of where you grew up and because of
the fact that you grew up in a Hispanic household,
where we know how that is, we we speak Spanglish.
My first four years in grammar school, I was at
(10:51):
best an average student, and that was because I learned
Spanish before I learned English at home. I was delayed
and only on understanding what teachers were teaching me. One
of the first things I did, I went to the
smartest girl in the class, Donna Ronnella. She's still a friend,
by the way. And I went up to Donna and
(11:11):
I said, you get good grades, how do you study?
Donna explained it to me, and after that I began
working at the lessons she gave me, and I became
a good student. So I think the greatest secret to
the success of my life isn't I being ashamed of
asking for help. And it's my hope that if anyone
(11:33):
is listening to me today that they understand how important
a characteristic that is to not only not be ashamed
of asking for help, but also to do it. I
know as a little girl justice he had a devastating illness.
(11:53):
What was that like? Yes, I'm a Type one juvenile
diabetic and I have been since I was seven years old.
That diagnosis was a very difficult one. It was not
an easy condition to live with. The treatments were rudimentary.
The needles were the glass needles with the metal points,
(12:16):
and what would happen is after many uses, the needle
would start wearing down and blunting. My father gave me
the shot the first day, and he was so nervous
his arm was shaking. The next morning, my mother was
home and she gave me the needle. I felt like
she just reared back and bullet my arm with the needle,
(12:41):
and that hurt. So the next morning, I'm in the
kitchen and I'm listening to them fight about who's going
to give me the needle. So I pulled a chair
to the stove because I had a heat the metal
needle and sterilize it. And Bommy sees what I'm doing
and she comes over her, and she says, what are
you doing? And I said, I'm gonna do this myself.
(13:04):
That's an example right there, at seven years old of Sony.
From the beginning, you were strong willed, you knew what
you wanted and that you had a very clear purpose.
Were you ashamed of it at all? Did you hide
it from anybody? Emily the shame. I hid my disease
(13:25):
into my thirties, and my openness developed after a party
that I hosted in my home. I had a sugar low.
I'm in a room full of my closest and dearest friends,
and not one of them knew that something was wrong.
Someone came over with a piece of the cake that
was being served, and I just opened my hand and
(13:48):
grabbed the cake and stuffed it into my mouth. And
at that point she knew something was wrong because that's
not the kind of thing that I would do, and
she stopped and she at, Sonya, what's going on. I've
then realized after the party that all of these people
who knew me and loved me and who I know,
(14:10):
if something had happened to me at that moment and
they had not taken care of me, that they would
have been devastated, and it was that moment that made
me realize that I had to be more open about
my condition, that I had to talk to the people
I loved about it absolutely and had to talk openly
about it, because hiding things doesn't help anyone. When did
(14:32):
you first start thinking about what you wanted to do?
What was in your mind when you were thinking about
your future? Obviously, I grew up in a housing project
in the Bronx, and there were no lawyers or judges
that I knew of in my neighborhood. And you can't
really dream to be something unless you know that something exists.
(14:54):
The real source of information about your possibilities is your education.
You can learn how to dream big. And your mother,
like mine, felt it was so important that you went
to a wonderful parochial school right with the nuns correct correct,
like you, I was on scholarship, and like you, my
(15:14):
grandmother was my hero, her grandmother was her hero, and
her grandmother was her hero. I feel that that's one
of the most wonderful things that Hispanic families have to
offer our kids, because our extended family is crucial in
the upbringing of our kids, and they have so much
(15:38):
wisdom and so much to offer. Grandmothers know a part
of you that others just don't see or understand. She
was such an influential part of my life. She was
our refuge in times of trouble with our parents, saw
both our strengths and our weaknesses. And you're right about
(15:59):
the theino extended families is such a critical part of
giving us a sense of belonging, of giving us a
sense of joy about life. Absolutely, And you got into
an Ivy League school, Justice, How did you do it?
How did you get into an Ivy League school. It
wasn't till my senior year of high school that a
(16:20):
very very dear friend of mine called me up. And
I still remember this conversation. Sonya, you have to apply
to the Ivy League schools. And I said, Ken, what
are those schools? And he listed a number of them.
And my next question was, well, I can't afford it.
You'll get a scholarship. Your family is poor enough, Sonia,
(16:42):
just apply And I said to him, but why should
I bother? And his answer was they're the best schools
in the country, Sonja. They will change your life. You
must try. I didn't know enough back then to have
anybody read my personal essay. I did the best that
I could. I'm grateful to this day that I got in.
(17:03):
What advice do you have maybe for somebody who is
desperately trying, you know, maybe to get into an ivy
league or something like that, and they just don't get
it the first time or for the second time. There
are reasons why one may be rejected from one place
but accepted in another. You can't focus on the no.
You have to focus on the yes. Gloria, you often
(17:25):
speak about Amilia being NonStop. I know both he and
you have that spirit in you. I'm happy you mentioned
Amilia because him and I are a team, and we've
been our own cheerleaders, and there's nothing that spurs us
on more than someone telling us no. That is the
(17:46):
most motivational word in emilias and my vocabulary, when somebody
says no, you're too American for that, and you're too
Latin for the Americans. You'll never cross over, You'll never
do this. You can't compete on a worldwide market, but
we have We have each other. You know what it
surprised me about Soto Mayori is every time I buy
(18:10):
her any of my release in my book and everything.
She's been there for me. Imagine having the you know,
Supreme Court, first Latin, a woman in the world, and
she comes and you know, support me. You do something
to prove that you can be incredible, succesful, and you
still can be simple and honest. And that's what I
love about her. Women are that matter? Man. I still
(18:31):
believe that. I know that you had a partner, your husband,
for seven years, and I know that you've been together
all through high school. What did you learn from that relationship?
From your marriage? You know, not every marriage succeeds, mind didn't,
(18:52):
but it was an incredibly important part of my life.
And we got married right after we finished college. Um
as to be expected in a Latina culture. I was
already an old lady. Gloria. Yes, we know, but I
appreciated from him understanding how the support of one another
(19:13):
is so critical in everyone's life. But perhaps I should
tell you a lesson that I learned from our breakup.
What I found out was that the people who have
got me through we're my girlfriends. Yes, we talked about
that all the time, and they rallied around me to
be the listening piece for the insecurities that I had
(19:36):
for the moments in which I felt alone, And I
think that many people should understand that both moments are
precious and important, those of being with someone and those
of being alone as well. It must be daunting, though Justice,
for someone to date you like because first year you're
(19:58):
a judge. It's been the rare person who has asked
me recently they would be afraid of you. Although I
must say, Gloria, I've had some fans right to me,
some gentlemen with more age than mine, right to me
and propose marriage. They're brave. I'm sure that you'll receive
(20:21):
some of those as well. Did you answer the letters? Oh?
I answer every letter I received. Okay, So what did
you answer? You think I wanted to I didn't say.
I said how thrilled and touched I was, but that
the business of my life was such that actually meeting
them was going to be very difficult. Well, ourur t
(20:42):
T community was so excited to hear that you were
gonna sit on the table, and they send us questions.
So this one is from Zoe. Let's see what she's
got tasked night. Question for Justice that they are is
what was your first day like to be answer. Oh,
my first day on the Supreme Court, I go to
(21:02):
my office and sitting in my office is a legal icon,
a justice by the name of Sandra Day O'Connor, and
she was sitting there waiting for me, and I was
so taken aback. That's such an important lady. She was
the first female justice on the Supreme Court in one
(21:28):
and she was alone on the court until Ruth Bader
Ginsburg came to the court in the ninet nineties. The
next visitor was John Paul Stevens, who at the time
was eighty eight and a half years old, and he
too was an icon of a justice. It was just
such a tremendous feeling to be welcomed by two of
(21:49):
the longest serving justices on the Court. I remember coming
out with my colleagues to sit at the bench and
I got chills down my back. Well, we're all living
vicariously through you. Absolutely, you are so sweet. We have
one more question. I want to know. Do you have
(22:10):
to dress up under your ropes? I guess you don't
have to do anything you don't want to when it
comes to what you wear when you have a rob on.
But the reality is that when you work on a
court like the Supreme Court, you do dress up. It's
been the most extraordinary adventure to be a justice of
(22:32):
the United States Supreme Court. Been tough on so many
different levels. How do you remain optimistic? Every time I
look sad at myself, I look around and see how
much I've been able to notice about positive things that
I've been able to see and notice about others. All
(22:55):
of us, in one way or another, have had to
come to terms with ourselves, and so I stay positive
always by trying to look at the positive. Well, what's
your advice for for the younger generations to help contribute
to this system and understand it more emily? You have
(23:16):
no choice. Your vision won't happen simply because you desire it.
Your vision only happens with hard work and commitment to
doing the right thing. I speak to kids all the time,
and I tell them that the most important role in
their life is being not a citizen with a capital C,
(23:40):
a citizen of a country, but being a citizen with
a small c a citizen of your community. That's the
most important role you can play in life. Just as
you've given us so much wisdom, So I want to
thank you I know that your words are going to
be incredibly important for everyone that is watching there today. Absolutely,
(24:03):
I hope that everybody knows Gloria. They know your talent
and Emilio's. But Emily, you are awesome. You play well.
I heard you play through the song that you created
for me. It wasn't to perform for you in any way,
and it was really just truly inspired by you and
(24:26):
who you are and what you do for me. And
I wrote it with the intention to do that to
somebody else. Emily, you touch my heart. She's never performed
in publicly, but she's wanted to debut the song in
your honor today and she's going, I'm oh, I'm so
touched them. Thank you. Every time I play it for
(24:49):
my mother, she cries, news is herb Still no one
(25:10):
knows what a real hero does. Stop looking all the
signals advertised, tilt eyes a little lower, justice, breathe when
she is going real changes made it dirt not sky.
(25:36):
Time to listen. We've been me s in that face.
He is a word can bear kill the sky? Her
last name doesn't change all the progress that she claimed
(25:56):
her country. This is what a in the macous like.
And she remains only brave. She is everything. Your daughter
should be everything your daughter could be, waiting on this
(26:30):
world to change, turning your brain to real, arrange flowers,
turn in the progress every day. Luckily, for girls like me,
we've had some proof to be a pillow for the
(26:51):
progress that we seek. Time to listen, Weber say that
this is what in Marickim looks like. Her last name
(27:14):
doesn't change all the progress that she claims a country.
This is what in American looks like. She means only bread.
She is everything your daughter should be. This is what
(27:38):
in Amaka looks like. Her last name doesn't change all
the progress that she claims the country is wor in
Americum looks like she remains only bread. She's everything you
(28:09):
do to d She's everything, and Tala should be everything
your daughter could be. Thanks for listening. To join the
(28:38):
Red Table Talk family and become a part of the conversation,
follow us at Facebook dot com, forward Slash, red table Talk, Stephens.
Red Table Talk via Stephens is a production of Westbrook
Studios in partnership with I Heart Radio's Michael Dura podcast Network.
For more podcasts from my Heart, visit the i Heart
(28:58):
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